Daily Post: Linger


She loves me..she loves me not...she loves me...oh God how I love chesse!

She loves me..she loves me not…she loves me…oh God how I love chesse!

Daily post: linger

There are many times in my 55 years of lifelexistrence that I have, or would have loved to linger, but the four below sum up what I bvelieve to the best about life as we live it, in all it’s comical  and gloriousform. I hope you enjoy what lies before you, and maybe take a little comfort and inspiration, or gain a little happiness form  what you see below

 

 

Mum...Daddy says you got big fat thighs!

Mum…Daddy says you got big fat thighs!

1/ Out of the mouths of bades and sucklings…

Don’t we all love children. Sweet innocent little things without a nasty bone in their cherubic little bodies, but Ooops, don’t they also say the most inappropriate things

Working within the retail sector it is fair to say that the whole of life passes in front of you. Sometimes it is glorious and inspiring, sometimes, well let us say, it is less so, and at others it is plain disgusting, but bring a child into the equation and boy oh boy life can be fun

One such incident occurred recently on a busy saturday, and my only regret is that I could not follow the father and child out of the store. The child in question was  a 7-8 yr old child, and her father had just selected a tear and share brioche. She looked at him,pointed at the brioche, and then frowned. Then she put her thoughts into words

“Daddy”

She admonished him.

” You can’t have that. Mummy has that and that’s why she got such big fat thighs!”

I live on a small island where your private business is public knowledge, and I have never seen a guy go so brick red, so sweaty, and lurch into such a desperate wild-eyed pivotal swing.

” You can’t say that!

He pleaded with her

” For god  sake don’t tell Mummy, what you’ve just told me and never, ever say those words again”

What happened outside the shop, or back at the little girls home I cannot tell you, but I wish I had been a fly on the wall

Excuse me---have you seen any hares?

Excuse me–have you seen any hares?

2/ The perfect Christmas present

How many of us have sworn at our offspring, or whatever at Christmas when the question of presents comes around. In our day , we think to ourselves, it was  a football, a  jigsaw puzzle, or an extra large chunk of chocolate, but not now, not for these little darlings, and not for these little horrors as they expectantly hold out their hands

Well I am here to tell you that it’s not always so, as just occasionally, there really is some relief from the storm. Many years ago I worked in catering and over peak periods, such as Christmas, split shifts and long working hours were the norm. So much so that, in good years you were exhausted, but in bad years you were so tired you could barely open a door. I always made sure that I made time to see the children of an old friend on Xmas day though, even if it was only for of couple of hours

This particular year had been an unholy terror of a year, but, out of affection I asked the perennial question of what would she like for Christmas

All she said was

“You. You will be there on Christmas day, won’t you”

I’ve never had such christmas present from a child or an adult. I don’t think I ever will, and I don’t think I need to tell anyone why I wanted to linger, and, if possible make time stand still

'Ooo put the lights on!!

WOW!!!

3/The Northern lights

We think were so clever us humans, but when nature gets going she really leaves us in the shade. Such is the case with the Northern lights, or to call them by their proper name the aurora borealis

As stated in a previous post-click here- the aurora borealis is:

a natural light display in the sky particularly in the high latitude (Arctic and Antarctic) regions, caused by the collision of energetic charged particles with atoms in the high altitude atmosphere (thermosphere). The charged particles originate in the magnetosphere and solar wind and, on Earth, are directed by the Earth’s magnetic field into the atmosphere.

Wikipedia aurora (astronomy)

But so what, that is my attitude when it comes to such things. Why do we need to know so much about the world that surrounds us, why can’t we simply sit back, or lie back, and enjoy. I was lucky, as I saw an hour long display of these celestial fireworks, and one day ia will go back north to see them again. To all those who have not seen them, I would just say go there and do so, over and over again. Forget the science, and forget the physics, this is one incredible light show that you will remember for years

Ivana...where are you..when will you come back from the war!

Ivana…where are you..when will you come back from the war!

4/What not to do at a concert

From the sublime to the ridiculous, after all any good post should end with a bang!

If anyone has been to a classical music concert, they will know that they have to behave. It doesn’t matter how inspirational the music is, nor how good the performance, you have just got to sit there is absolute silence and God help you if you even allow yourself a smile.

So it was one night at the Barbican concert hall in London UK. One of the works that night was Rachmaninov’s 2nd Piano concerto. It is a wonderful piano concerto, for those who like his music, and virtuoso hear-on-the-sleeve piano music, but I was there more on sufferance than by choice. I prefer the music of Beethoven and Mozart myself, but little did I know what was in store

Have you ever had one of those nights when a sense of the ridiculous sweeps over you, and then engulfs you like  a tsunami or an exceptionally high spring tide. My mind broke when the orchestra, in the last movement, really got going. The violins sobbed, the viola’s wept profusely, and I won’t even try to contemplate what was going on over the ivories, but in the final movement when all hell breaks loose and emotions surge throughout the concert hall, I had a vision

A wonderful vision of a russian peasant called Vladimir passionately yearning for his true love Ivana who had gone of to fight in a war. He was sitting on the banks of the Volga, and, for some God forsaken reason, he had an alcohol sodden beetroot, clasped against his chest.

The more the violins sobbed, the more he yearned for his Ivana. The more he yearned the tighter he clasped his beetroot, and, not unnaturally, the greater the volume of beetroot juice that flooded across the floor

I didn’t laugh, but I certainly sniggered merrily, and though I wasn’t thrown out of the concert hall, my dear wife, who loved, and still loves the work ;and who was with me at the time, has never been able to listen to the work without laughing again.

I so wanted to comfort Vlad-i poos though; even if I got smothered in beetroot juice before having to jump into the Volga for a swim

So there you go folks, I hope you enjoyed my trip down memory lane. Drop by see whats going on at any time

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Categories: DPchallenge, Just a thought

Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,

9 replies

  1. You had me laughing here.

    Like

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