That’s right folks,
Life just ain’t fair
Or so it seemed to one cashier on Sunday morning when, very hungover, she crawled into work after a night on the tiles
She accepted that she had chosen, by her own free will, God only know s what plus at least a major part of a bottle of vodka. She recognised that she was ion a disheveled state and suffering from the mother of all hangovers, and she acknowledged the fact that, contractually she was meant to come into work on time, smart, sober, alert, and clean. None of this was disputed, although she was barely in a fit state to dispute anything, but in her own words, when she could speak intelligibly half an hour alter, our hangover cure went just a little too far
A bollocking was understandable, if a little painful; a slap on the back to bring her back to her senses was also in order ;but the mug of black coffee with a raw egg floating around in it, brought back, or maybe I should say brought up vivid if somewhat unpleasant reminders of the booze and the late night vindaloo curry she had consumed the night cum morning before
The hair of the dog, that’s what we called it, maybe one from the dog in the picture, but she took violent exception to our little cocktail, and puked up all over the floor.
What has this got to do with life, and it’s apparent unfairness; well what HAS’NT this got to do with it, for how many times have all of us uttered such words. I have uttered them, many times, both as an adult as well as a child, and at times, in jest, they have proved to be quite comical, but at a deeper level, how many times do we utter such words, especially as adults, when a sobering reality lies closer to home.
What reality is this, well quite simply, life isn’t fair. It never was, it never is, and it never will be, but we still cling onto this curious dream that it should be so. There are many examples in life of what I am talking about, but, with the prefix of …it’s not fair that…see what you think of the list below
- It’s raining and I’ve got to go outside with the rubbish
- I’ve got to do homework
- He or she earns more than me for the same workload
- She’s getting child benefit for her “Just-one–of-those-things” or “accidents do happen” baby, out of our taxes
- That my cat has just dumped a dead mouse on my pillow
- I have to go to work in the morning
- He or she is going out with the lass or bloke I fancy
- I’m ill, I’m hungover, I need a doctor
- Why can’t I have what he’s got
- His is bigger than mine
Recognise any of the above, well what if some slightly less than kind individual gave us the following responses
- Do as you’re told, or they’ll be no supper for you!
- Tough, now get on with it!
- Welcome to the workplace sunshine!
- Not her problem, sue the government!
- That’s his way of saying he likes you, plus he want’s his breakfast that you should have given him an hour ago!
- Don’t we all?
- Ah diddums!, have a black coffee, a black coffee with a raw egg inside!
- Pay up and it’s yours!
- Whoa TOO MUCH INFORMATION!
I think we might feel slightly aggrieved at such a commentary, but, if we are being honest with ourselves, why do we expect life to be fair when we ignore the inequalities suffered by all other life forms around us. A wonderful American singer song- writer, satirist, pianist and mathematician called Tom Lehrer, whose you-tube videos can be seen at the head of this post ; one commented that
“Life is like a sewer — what you get out of it depends on what you put into it!”
Introduction to “We Will All Go Together When We Go”-Tom Lehrer
And I cannot think of a better way to describe life in all it’s dubious glory; except that is for one more small but very important proviso. Sometimes other life forms dump things into your sewerage system, and what comes out at the other end can come as a nasty surprise.
We are still better of than most other life forms though, after all think of what we casually, or I suppose lovingly, put on our dinner plates when we a a meal. Do we really think that the cow or bullock wanted to be strung up in a slaughter house, zapped, until nearly dead, and then have it’s belly ripped open- that’s where our steak comes from. What of our lovely roast chickens, all pumped full of water, antibiotics, flavourings, and preservatives. By the time their corpse sit the conveyor belt they know nothing of such implants or indignities, but as they were slaughtered in readiness for our consumption, does it matter that they, in their own way, screamed or complained?
Somehow I think not, and such a list of inequalities could go on ad infinitum but maybe the next time we bleat about life’s unfairness and inequalities, we should wise up, grow up, and smell the roses (which roses by the way-anyone know?), and accept that life, as stated earlier isn’t fair. That it never was, it never is, and it never will be, and that there are far more urgent things to think about than whether or life is or isn’t fair
What do you think though, do you think life should be, or even is, fair? Please feel free to respond if you feel like it; I’d love to hear you views.
Hope you enjoy the videos by the way, I think they are fun, even after so many years.