The Living Dead

19 years on and you STILL forget to bring home the bacon…MEN!

Leaves Home 1886, declared dead 1994, applies fora driving licence 2005,

What if… couldn’t make it up could you, but it’s true folks, and it’s happened in Ohio. There does remain one question though, is he dead or is he alive, read on and all will soon become clear

Donald Miller, that’s the poor beggars name, and he’s alive and kicking the same as all of us, all het up and raring to go. Or is he, as in accordance with US law, he’s legally dead, and, after three years, such rulings cannot be overturned.

“A strange, strange situation,” Judge Alan Davies called it “I don’t know where that leaves you, but you’re still deceased as far as the law is concerned.”A strange situation indeed, so where might it leave him, after all what would happen of he decided to enter into a physiocal relationship, try and get life insurance, or to drive.

Could he get married, would his partner be charged with necrophilia, and if they had children, would they be “alive”. As regards life insurance, how would he fare as regards the question of life expectancy, and being dead already, how might he make a claim

Finally the question of driving. What would happen if he was involved in, and was the cause of, a non fatal accident. I am sure that somewhere in the universe there are laws for the dead but as he is dead while still in the land of the living, how much responsibility could be placed by his side.

I can just see the scene as I am writing. Two wrecked cars and a head scratching police officer

” What have you got to say for yourself then?” says the officer

“Sorry squire, I can’t help you. You’ll need to get a medium or a ouija board; I’ve died!”

Perhaps the last word should be left to Mr Miller, after all he is at the heart of our tale

“It kind of went further than I ever expected it to,” Mr Miller told the media. “I just kind of took off, ended up in different places.”

Sure thing Mr Miller, I hope you had a good time!


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